Never underestimate {the power of a good example}

As a mother, I love the precious little moments where you simply have to stop and smile.

They happen pretty regularly. They are truly one of the highlights of being a mother.

Moments when my heart is so full it could burst, filled with the joy of parenthood. If you are a parent, you'll understand.

I had one of those moments the other day.

Susie had been helping me in the kitchen (she's only 8, nearly 9, but one of the BEST helpers in the universe, I reckon. Yes, I am biased, but even still....), but she got called away to another job. So, I was left washing up with no-one to help me dry up.

Or, so I thought.

Until my little 2 year old, Tabitha, came up to where I was, grabbed a tea towel, and enthusiastically began to dry up!

I didn't ask her.

I didn't even show her how to do it.

She just did it, all of her own volition.

But, DID someone show her how to do it?

Well, yes, they DID! I showed her siblings how to help, and she watched ME drying up, and her SIBLINGS drying up, and she just copied them.  She learnt by EXAMPLE.

I know it can work they other way, and I often tell my children to be careful what they do, because little eyes are watching. However, this was one of those heart-throb moments when you remember that they DO see the good, and they DO copy it, too!

Our role as a mother isn't just to correct and train, but it's also to be a good example. Not just in how to keep a house, but in our other behaviour, too.

If we are loving, affectionate, caring, tender, compassionate, helpful, and the many other things we SHOULD be, then there is a high chance of that good rubbing right off on our children. Only the Lord can do a true transforming work in their hearts, but He can use our good example as a means of drawing their hearts to Him. We are called to be Christlike, and little eyes are watching to see us put that into action.

So, whatever we do, day by day - whether it be something ordinary and mundane, or something more important - we must never underestimate the power of a good example.

"And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not."

Galatians 6:9

Be still.... {a message made for mothers}

I was browsing through Instagram last week, as I do. It's such an inspiring place with all the visual impact that comes from the pictures shared.

I saw a picture shared by Rebecca from Grace and Salt ink. It was very nicely showing off her lovely inkDori's (one of which I have), and the words on the journal said simply "Be still and know that I am God". (Psalm 46:10)

As you may know, I have a gorgeous little boy who is now 4 weeks old. Having a baby, and more particularly if you feed them yourself, you are forced to sit down on a regular basis, and sit still.

It's not a natural thing for a busy mother to do. We always have something we can be doing - especially if you have little ones, or if you homeschool like I do. Even if you don't, there are school runs and after school clubs. Mums, by their very definition, are active and "on the go". It's just who we are.

But, this verse reminded me of both a spiritual and a temporal truth.

It's GOOD to be still!

Physically, sitting still to feed a baby gives me the chance to rest. It makes me stop from everything else around me, and JUST SIT. It's bliss. There's no denying it. I love those moments where I get to bond with my baby, and put my feet up. Yes, I am often doing other things (like supervising school work, directing the children in their chores, or talking on the phone), but sometimes I just take the time to read, rest, and pray. Especially in the night, many people are prayed for in those still moments.

Everything else simply HAS to stop, because feeding my baby, which is something only I can do, MUST be done. It's an imposed stillness. If I didn't take that time to be still, my baby wouldn't thrive. He'd quickly let me know he wasn't happy, and he'd end up suffering from my neglect.

Our spiritual life is no different.

We NEED to make the time to "be still".

Why?

It's in those times, when we make everything else stop, and still our hearts before God, that we KNOW He is God. We are aware of His incredible attributes, and His wonderful nature. We truly KNOW He is God when we tune out the clamour of our everyday lives, of the world that surrounds us, and when we focus on HIM.

Mothers can be so busy listening to our husband, children, friends and other "voices" that we can neglect the time to just listen for what GOD wants to say to us. Stilling our minds and hearts, and finding God's voice in our lives.

It may be time spent in prayer. Something I MUST do more of.

It may be time reading His Word.

It may be listening to a sermon, or simply resting and meditating on how much we have to be thankful for.

But, whatever it is, we should take heed to these words if we want to know God better.

Be still.

(pen: Staedtler Noris Club double ended fibre tip

white writing: masking fluid with a paintbrush

background: watercolour wash)

(I listened to these albums during labour again, and this remains a favourite of mine.)

I'm back! {I should have said I was GONE!}

HELLLLOOOOO!

I feel terrible.

I should have formally announced that I was taking a break from blogging, but I didn't really PLAN it. It just kind of happened.

It went a bit like this.

I was tired. I was overwhelmed. I had so much I was trying to do that NEEDED to be done.

Then, I was passing on some advice to a sweet lady who was also feeling overwhelmed. Someone had said to me that it's easy to try and do things that are GOOD, but aren't actually the BEST thing for you at that time. Nothin' wrong with the THING, just that it's not best for that season.

I passed on the advice, then had a revelation.

I needed to take the advice for MYSELF!!

I took a FB break. It was just something else I didn't need to be thinking about. (I'm still not on my "normal" account. I had to set up another with the bare bones of necessity, because of groups I was in relating to school work we are involved with on the internet - but, I hope to get back soon....)

It then led to be me taking a general internet break. Which included the blog. It was something else that was GOOD, but not best for me in that season.

I have missed it more than the other internet related things. I love connecting with other Mums, but I just needed to connect with the Lord, and with my family.

I should have just let you all know, but that is how hard I was finding things. Just getting up the mental "togetherness" to write a blog post was beyond my capabilities at that time.

Truth.

For me to admit I was overwhelmed was a big step on its own. I'm a "get on with things" kind of gal, but I had to just acknowledge that I couldn't. And STOP! Rest. Have a break.

It's done me the world of good. It's been a help to body, mind and soul.

But, I'm keen to get back. Blogging helps me to thing about what I am doing, and to sift through my own learning and life. If it can help others at the same time, all the better, right?

So, what have I been up to??

I have to start with the most important thing, really....

I've had a baby.

I really must type up my birth story, but THAT is a whole 'nother story, not for today,

Suffice to say, he has arrived.

Yes, he.

Ezekiel Timothy Cordle - just a touch over 7lb 2 oz - born 16/02/16 at 6.30am. (After a looong night - but, I said, that's a whole other blog post!)

Enough of the gibbering.  Here he is...

Freshly newborn. Can you smell that sweet newborn smell?

I think he was a day old here. He's been so alert!

Sleeping...

More sleeping...

Oh, and more sleeping...

Just this last weekend he started smiling, too. Look at THAT for a smile! 

Mummy and Ezekiel.

I love this one. Tabitha had been so excited about the "baba". This was the evening after he was born. Look how pleased she is! SOOOOO precious. 

And this is when we went for a walk when he was about a week old. Yes, he's tucked in there in my Moby sling. All snug in my coat. 

Sorry about that. Got a bit carried away with pictures of a cute little boy.

I have sooo much more to share about what I have been up to, but I just wanted to say a "hello", and launch back into the blogosphere. 

Art and lettering.

Scripture writing.

Journaling Bible.

And, most of all I can't wait to share again what God teaches me as I walk daily with Him. 

I've had some really hard days in the last year, and especially the last 6 months. Really hard. I was soooo tired, emotionally, physically and mentally. 

Ezekiel's name literally means "God strengthens".

We chose it because that is how I got through this pregnancy. By God giving me the strength I need. (And, by the by, after the delivery I had, the name meant even more... more of that another day!)

I am so thankful for my faithful heavenly Father, who gives me the strength I need every day, unfailingly. As the hymn writer penned

"He gives me strength from day to day, without Him I would fall"

My verse for this year was Psalm 73:26. God is my strength, and He is my portion - He is EVERYTHING I need. He is sufficient. He is God. How could I want or need anything more?

I wanted to make a graphic but my photo editing program I use is acting up tonight. I remembered I have the verse on a special notebook I have (more about THAT in another blog post, too), but a shout out to the source, to give proper credit - Rebecca at Grace and Salt Ink, and her amazing lettering.

So, this is me - back. By God's grace and strength I hope to pick up where I left off, and continue to encourage other wives, mums, and women who seek to follow after Christ in an everyday way.

I can't wait to share with you about the things that I love and have learnt.

Be back soon!

Long Story Short {children's Bible book FREE on Kindle today!}

(this post contains affiliate links)

I have been meaning to share about a book we got recently, but today I have prompted to tell you RIGHT NOW. Why? Well, a book by the same writer is FREEEEE on Kindle today, so here's me telling you!

Recently, our poor Susie had an accident when riding a scooter, and got a nasty gash above her eye. What started out as nasty, but treated with glue, turned into something nastier. She got a swelling above her eye that wouldn't go down like normal swelling, then she got a raised temperature and became quite poorly a week later.

I took her to the Dr, who sent her to the paeds ward in the hospital. It transpires she had an abscess, which then needed a hospital admission and surgical intervention to clear it.

Very kindly, the Church we were visiting when it happened (they have a games evening for children), sent a gift to Susie, to wish her a speedy recovery.

It was "The Gospel Story Bible", by Marty Machowski.

It's a fab book. It goes through the many stories of the Bible, at a level suitable for children. More to the point, it brings "the gospel" into each one. It points them to Christ, and tells them of their need of the Saviour.  What better story book can you have, than one that makes THAT application for boys and girls?

I highly recommend the book, and there are 156 stories, which is LOADS! I worked out, with our 4 day week, that there are nearly enough to do a whole year of devotionals to tie in with our school day!

You could use it in Children's Ministry, too. There is even a Bible curriculum with printable PDF resources, suitable for all ages of Sunday School. ( I could only find it in the USA)

Well, what I found out today, is that she has written OTHER books, and one of them is FREE on Kindle today!

Long Story Short.

No, I'm not about to tell you something briefly.

It's the title of the book!

This is a family devotional, again bringing the gospel clearly into the stories. It is based on the Old Testament, and points the children towards Christ through it all. It seems like it's also really good, and I can't wait to use it with the children.

Of course, if you read this when the offer is gone, you can still get it as a hard copy, from Amazon USA, and from Amazon UK.

But, today (and I don't know how long the offer will last), it is free both on Amazon.com  and Amazon.co.uk , so not only on one side of the Atlantic! (which does happen! - and usually the OTHER side of the Atlantic)

Now come on... WHO doesn't like something for FREEEEE????

Better still, a good quality Bible book for children?

Perfect combo, in my opinion.

Now, go off.  Run as fast as you can to your device of choice and get it ON there!

And, if you are too late, consider buying the hard copy, because these are books worth having in your home, as you raise your children for the Lord. (See the carousel below)

Love is free {lessons from Cinderella}

On Saturday I watched the new Cinderella movie with my children.  That was a quite a feat for me. I got my jobs done in time to sit down and watch a movie! It was Abi's birthday, and her birthday treat, so, of course, I wanted to enjoy it too.... aherm.

I really enjoyed it, as "fairytales" go. It was well made, and more than anything else, it wasn't all lovey-dovey. I liked that the main theme was "courage and kindness".

Courage to do something different. Not always doing what "has always been done". Realising the right thing can sometimes go against the norm.

Kindness. It's always right to try and show kindness. It's not always EASY, but it's the right thing to do. You can even find someone to be really obnoxious and mean, and still show kindness. Look at how Cinderella turns around and says "I forgive you" to her step mother, whilst still having the courage to walk away from a horrible situation.

That's the obvious and predictable lesson from the movie. It's a good plan in life - courage and kindness.

It's a good plan as a Christian.  The courage to do what is right, and to follow after God and His ways, even if no-one else is doing it. The willingness to show kindness, even if a situation or a person seems not to deserve it. "Be ye kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another".  It's a spot on, Biblical principle.

But, no.

That is not what *I* took away from it.

One little thing that Cinderella said got me thinking.

"Love is free"

Why, yes, Cinderella, you are so right. Love IS free!

But, it doesn't always mean there is no cost involved.

That's what got me thinking.

The Biblical pattern we have is to love unconditionally. Our love is given freely, as the powerful verse in Hosea reminds us

"I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely:"

Hosea 14:4  

If we are to be followers of Christ, we need to love freely, as He loves us. Despite our backsliding and sinful failings, He loves us freely. 

But, there is a cost involved in loving. 

It doesn't necessarily cost us financially, in a literal sense, but in many other senses, there is cost. 

It will cost us time. We need to be willing to give of our time, to express our love to others. 

It will cost us self. We need to be willing to give up our selfish desires, when we extend love to others. 

It will cost us emotionally. We need to be willing to give of ourselves - heart and soul - to others, so that we may end up feeling totally spent, in making sure our love is expressed to the ones we love.

It will cost us because love should be sacrificial. It literally means that it costs US. 

We give up of ourselves in order to extend love to someone else. 

"And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you;"

II Corinthians 12:15 

It's NOT about a fuzzy feeling on the inside, however. In fact, sometimes in order to show love to someone else it can break our heart on the inside. We may have to do or say things as we give our love freely, that hurts us and makes us fall apart in ways people will never see. It may not be reciprocated (see the rest of II Corinthians 12:15 for the reality check on THAT one... go on, look it up....)

But, we still love freely.

We need look no further for our example than the Lord. Freely, He loved us.  Freely, He GAVE. He have up His very life - His body broken, on the tree. Assaulted, hurt, despised, rejected of men. 

"freely ye have received, freely give."

Matthew 10:8 

Loving.

Freely.

How do I love? Do I love freely enough? Do I extend my love sacrificially and spending all of myself, in order to freely give that love.

Yes, love is free, but we need to be willing to count the cost. 

If God doesn't want us to fear {what DOES He want us to have?}

The life of a Christian is not an easy life. Add to that being a wife, then being a mother, then also being a mother of school-aged children (no matter your educational choices), and the "easy" tally doesn't get any bigger.

Sometimes, it's not even just hard.

There are moments, days, and weeks where we could easily be gripped and overcome with fear.

It can be as simple as seeing all the opportunities for danger in the confines of a home.

It can be the crossing of a road, or the travelling in a car.

Circumstances can occur which bring fear to the front of our minds.  Difficult times when we face trials and difficulties, and fearing the day ahead, never mind the future, can have an almost crippling effect.

Child birth, breastfeeding, and rearing a small family - and an ever growing family - can make fear nudge at our thoughts.

The "what ifs?" of life can become a weight around our neck, and fear creeps in until it consumes us.

Recently, on his way through systematic teaching on II Timothy, my husband preached on the verse in chapter 1, that many would have heard before.

It really struck my heart, as a woman whose heart is inclined towards fear, in many circumstances. It holds so much truth, and so much depth of meaning.

It directs our minds, firstly, to something that God has not given us.

Fear.

When we fear, it doesn't come from God. We are to fear GOD, but we are NOT to fear our circumstances, and the situations we may, or may not, encounter in life.

God has NOT given us fear.

If it's not from Him, where IS it coming from?

It's that sneaky old serpent, the wily one, the devil.

HE wants us to be so gripped with fear, that our eyes are taken clean off what God HAS given us, which is what the second part of the verse tells us.

If the fear isn't from Him, what DOES he want us to have?

Power.

Love.

A sound mind.

Do you see?  Do you see what God has given?

A three-fold gift that encompasses body, heart and mind.

Power.  God has given us power.  This word, at its roots, is the word "dunamis". It's the root from which we get words like dynamite, and dynamic.

δύναμις
dunamis
doo'-nam-is
From G1410; force (literally or figuratively); specifically miraculous power (usually by implication a miracle itself): - ability, abundance, meaning, might (-ily, -y, -y deed), (worker of) miracle (-s), power, strength, violence, mighty (wonderful) work.

When we are feeling fearful, and weak, as the devil puts thoughts in our minds that are not of God, we need to claim that miraculous, supernatural power, that only comes from God. But, come from God it DOES! He has given it to us, and we need only use it. 

The word also implicates abundance. It's not a power that fails, or runs out, like earthly power sources. It's never-failing, and all sufficient, in our battle against the temptations of the flesh and the devil. We don't need to let it have the victory in our lives, because we have power. He will give us physical strength to do all we need to do in the situation He has us walking through. We have spiritual power to battle the wicked one, and to quench his fiery darts.

What else does God give us?

Love.

Love is one of the most powerful gifts that God has given us. A heart that is loving in the way which God has intended us to, has the power to conquer all fear.  If our hearts are filled up with loving God, and loving each other - if we are so consumed with love, gifted from God -  then we won't give a second thought to fear. 

ἀγάπη

agapē

ag-ah'-pay

From G25; love, that is, affection or benevolence; specifically (plural) a love feast: - (feast of) charity ([-ably]), dear, love.

I love the concept of a "love feast", here in Strongs! We need to have our hearts feasting upon love - we need to take our fill of it, and be satisfied with it. Relish it. Enjoy it. Savour it. 

When we then have our hearts filled up with love, we won't fear. 

How does the verse end?  With a concept that every woman struggles with. I'm convinced it's more of a female thing. 

Convinced.

A sound mind.

Our minds tend toward being over-thinkers. We over analyse, mull over, ponder and repeat, until we have ourselves in a tangled mess of thoughts that bring us to a place of crippling fear. Whether it's thinking about what OTHERS think of us, or thinking about what we may have said or done to offend others, or simply thinking about things that may never happen, we tie ourselves up in a web of thoughts that bring our minds to a place that is dark and fearful.

That is NOT having a sound mind. 

σωφρονισμός

sōphronismos

so-fron-is-mos'

From G4994; discipline, that is, self control: - sound mind.

A sound mind is a mind that is brought into subjection. A mind over which we exercise self control.  Not a mind where thoughts run away into endless mazes of unproductive fears and concerns. 

No.  

A mind that is focussed on the Saviour - the one who rules in our hearts and keeps us in perfect peace, if we only have the self control to keep our minds on Him. 

Oh, my sinful, straying heart. My heart that fears, when it simply doesn't need to. I don't need to even spare a thought for anything further than right now. And, right now, I can claim the power, love and sound mind of  Heavenly Father who cares for me more deeply than I will EVER know or understand.  

My Saviour. 

My Jesus. 

He speaks strength to my heart instead of weakness.

He speaks love into my heart instead of enmity, bitterness and hate.

He speaks sound thoughts and peace into my mind instead of unrest, clamour and doubt.

So, how do I practically battle this fear that threatens my peace?

I arm myself for battle!  

I fight with prayer, and I equip myself with His Word. If I keep His word to the front of my mind, I will be able to claim the promises - EVERY SINGLE ONE - that He has given in His word.

Search His Word daily, and keep a note of those promises, as He lays them upon your heart. Cherish them. Memorise them. Claim them.

And, cast out the fear and replace it with power, love and a mind that is fixed upon God.

My top tips for toilet training {pinch of salt will be needed}

My words of wisdom for a Friday afternoon, based on recent thoughts and ponderings on a recent non-success in toilet training.

 Ten easy steps to toilet training

1) Rip up all your carpets and put down wipe clean flooring.

2) Remove all commitments from your life, including looking after any other children, or turning your head for a single moment.

3) Buy about 100 packs of cheap underwear so you can simply throw it away when it gets soiled.

4) Also buy your local shop's entire supply of anti-bacterial spray and kitchen roll.

5) Don't try and do it when you are pregnant, have recently given birth, or have other baby type people to look after.

6) Don't ever get upset, frustrated, tired, cross, frustrated, tired or, did I say cross?....

7) Find lots of extreme and sugar laden treats to ply on your child, ideas to reward that you found on Pinterest, written by people who have either never toilet trained, or live in a world that does not include number 5 (see above).

8) Place your child in a completely wipe clean room, with only wipe clean toys, and a toilet in situ.

9) If you homsechool, consider sending your child to nursery until they are toilet trained (they do it for you there, apparently...) and pull them out once they are toilet trained....

10) Refer to list number 2.


(PLEASE tell me you realise list 1 was NOT serious....???)


List 2

1) First, arm yourself in prayer, and seek God's wisdom as to the timing to start.

2) In that decision making, remember that there is no such thing as the "right" time to toilet train.

3) Ignore all the comments from people who snarkily try and suggest your X year old child "should" be trained by now.

4) Remember YOU are the parent, and you know your child better than anyone else.

5) Try  your best for as long as you can, and if it doesn't work, STOP. It's not a hill worth dying on.

6) Do use treats and rewards if you think it will work - don't lose sleep over the amazing things other people seem to implement, and incredible reward charts they seem to dream up. You DON'T need them.

7) If at first you don't succeed, try again when it suits you and the child better.

8) Try and avoid any time you are going to already feel vulnerable, low or easily defeated. (Like, in pregnancy....)

9) Surround yourself with others who have BTDT, and only those who will encourage you, not berate or discourage you. They will often give you words of wisdom and advice that will help, but even their advice may not work for YOU.

10) Remember that each child is different. They don't all train early. It's a physiological ability that they have to master, and some simply can't master it when they are little.

AND, my biggest "note to self"....

Never yet have a I known of a man to walk up the aisle in a nappy. I doubt my small person who I am currently not having much success toilet training will be the exception.

(And, as in the words of Hebrews 11.... " And what shall I more say? for the time would fail me to tell of...."

The time my toddler played with poo with a sibling, on the floor, with a toy digger,

The times I have gone around the house soaking up bodily fluids.

The moment when I had to clean poo off a wall.

The day when a child played with poo with a wooden spoon (yes, it went in the bin...spoon and poo) )


Can you tell that toilet training is actually one of my LEAST favourite parts of being a mother?? I'd sooner give birth than toilet train.

...The joys of parenthood (ok, mostly motherhood....)

Therein endeth my words of wisdom.

Have a good day.