So, this post is NOT about Mastermind!! LOL
I have several things in life that I battle with....okay, maybe it's more than several, if I am honest with myself!
One of the worst, I think, is starting things, and not finishing them. Cross-stitch projects, crochet projects, books (although less often with this - not novels! *blush* ), organisation, planning.
I was thinking about it a lot, this evening. Mainly, because I was thinking about it in the realm of things that are important. Things that were good for me to start. Not menial things. My scripture memorisation of Phillipians. My Bible study of Ephesians. My "read through the Bible in a year".
It got me to thinking...."WHY do I not finish some of these things???" Especially considering that I was benefiting from them greatly, and WANT to finish them.
There may be more than one answer to my question. I know why I tripped up. And, I do feel, it is a "good" reason. I became pregnant! When I am in the early stages, my life has to get pared down to the basics and essentials. Mornings become a struggle, and that is often when I get that quiet time to apply myself to profitable activities. But, then I got to thinking, why do I find it so hard to get going again? I am feeling better now! I have no reason not to.
Then it hit me. With tremendous clarity. I am my son's mother. I didn't realise it before. Well, actually, PHYSICALLY speaking, I am WELL aware of it. Those 24 hours, just over a year ago, will be etched in my mind FOR-EVER....but, character speaking.
I have noticed, since homeschooling, that my oldest son is a bit of a perfectionist. In some ways. Not in all ways (like me!....) If he can't do a job the way he wants to, or expected to, he gives up, usually with frustration.
"I can't do it, Mum...it's not how I wanted it to be, so why should I finish it?"
Do we call this pride? Maybe. I think, with me, it may be that. I can't do it the way I set out to in my mind, so I can't get up the "mind over matter" to pick up, dust off and keep going.
Maybe it's "non-perseverance"? I am not keeping my hand on the plough?
Maybe it IS a weird sort of perfectionism - "I'm not doing it the way *I* wanted to, so why finish?"
WHATEVER it is, it's wrong! I need to change my expectations. I need to not worry if I don't finish when I said I would, (pride concerning what others will think of me) or thought I would (pride in my own heart). The best thing to do would have been to finish when I thought I should. But, things happen, Things which God has planned for my life. So, it follows that God didn't expect that I should be able to do what *I* thought was best, but what *HE* thinks is best! He will be more pleased with me FINISHING, than giving up because I didn't keep "on plan".
It reminds me of the little adage
"good, better best, never let it rest, until your good is better, and your better best"
It was good to start the project at all.
It would have been better to finish it on time.
But, it is best that I pick up where I left off, and finish the job that I started!
The best thing to do, is not always what you THINK it will be. Take a step back from your "failures" and disappointments, and think "what would be the BEST thing to do, in the circumstances I am in right OW?
God will honour those who honour Him.
So, I will dig out my little book, filled with my printed verses of scripture to memorise, and keep going.
I will keep reading through my Bible reading plan - and take my time, listening for God's "still small voice" , instead of rushing through to "get it done in a year".
I will keep taking notes on Ephesians....I may not be where the others from my Good Morning Girls group are, but it's such a good book to study, it would be silly to give up, just because I am not "where they are".
Look at your life. If you feel you are "failing" at a task, it may just be that God has simply altered the time-frame! Don't give up! Finish, by God's grace, and in GOD'S time, what you started!
I have several things in life that I battle with....okay, maybe it's more than several, if I am honest with myself!
One of the worst, I think, is starting things, and not finishing them. Cross-stitch projects, crochet projects, books (although less often with this - not novels! *blush* ), organisation, planning.
I was thinking about it a lot, this evening. Mainly, because I was thinking about it in the realm of things that are important. Things that were good for me to start. Not menial things. My scripture memorisation of Phillipians. My Bible study of Ephesians. My "read through the Bible in a year".
It got me to thinking...."WHY do I not finish some of these things???" Especially considering that I was benefiting from them greatly, and WANT to finish them.
There may be more than one answer to my question. I know why I tripped up. And, I do feel, it is a "good" reason. I became pregnant! When I am in the early stages, my life has to get pared down to the basics and essentials. Mornings become a struggle, and that is often when I get that quiet time to apply myself to profitable activities. But, then I got to thinking, why do I find it so hard to get going again? I am feeling better now! I have no reason not to.
Then it hit me. With tremendous clarity. I am my son's mother. I didn't realise it before. Well, actually, PHYSICALLY speaking, I am WELL aware of it. Those 24 hours, just over a year ago, will be etched in my mind FOR-EVER....but, character speaking.
I have noticed, since homeschooling, that my oldest son is a bit of a perfectionist. In some ways. Not in all ways (like me!....) If he can't do a job the way he wants to, or expected to, he gives up, usually with frustration.
"I can't do it, Mum...it's not how I wanted it to be, so why should I finish it?"
Do we call this pride? Maybe. I think, with me, it may be that. I can't do it the way I set out to in my mind, so I can't get up the "mind over matter" to pick up, dust off and keep going.
Maybe it's "non-perseverance"? I am not keeping my hand on the plough?
Maybe it IS a weird sort of perfectionism - "I'm not doing it the way *I* wanted to, so why finish?"
WHATEVER it is, it's wrong! I need to change my expectations. I need to not worry if I don't finish when I said I would, (pride concerning what others will think of me) or thought I would (pride in my own heart). The best thing to do would have been to finish when I thought I should. But, things happen, Things which God has planned for my life. So, it follows that God didn't expect that I should be able to do what *I* thought was best, but what *HE* thinks is best! He will be more pleased with me FINISHING, than giving up because I didn't keep "on plan".
It reminds me of the little adage
"good, better best, never let it rest, until your good is better, and your better best"
It was good to start the project at all.
It would have been better to finish it on time.
But, it is best that I pick up where I left off, and finish the job that I started!
The best thing to do, is not always what you THINK it will be. Take a step back from your "failures" and disappointments, and think "what would be the BEST thing to do, in the circumstances I am in right OW?
God will honour those who honour Him.
So, I will dig out my little book, filled with my printed verses of scripture to memorise, and keep going.
I will keep reading through my Bible reading plan - and take my time, listening for God's "still small voice" , instead of rushing through to "get it done in a year".
I will keep taking notes on Ephesians....I may not be where the others from my Good Morning Girls group are, but it's such a good book to study, it would be silly to give up, just because I am not "where they are".
Look at your life. If you feel you are "failing" at a task, it may just be that God has simply altered the time-frame! Don't give up! Finish, by God's grace, and in GOD'S time, what you started!
Hi Caroline! I just popped into to see what you were writing about. We have that little perfectionist problem here too. I didn't mind it nearly so much in myself until I saw it in my 6yo! He is either on top of the world because the task is "easy" for him, or he's frustrated and sobbing when things are at all challenging. He can either "do it himself" or "it's too hard!" I tell him he doesn't really leave much room for me to teach him anything!
ReplyDeleteSo we continue talking and working and struggling through it together. I'm glad that he is here with me, so that it doesn't get swept under the rug. Character training (for mommy too) is such a big part of homeschooling. I'm thankful for that.
Enjoyed your post. Thank you!
This is probably one of my biggest 'works in progress'... not the perfectionist thing (definitely not! I think....), but the starting-but-not-finishing-thing.
ReplyDeleteAnd it's wrong. I know it is. I think (and you mentioned it in the post) one thing that makes me finish is not being worried about 'how' or 'when', but just to plod on, and get the thing I began--- finished..
A x
We all have those! I am not so much myself, but sometimes lose heart along the way.
ReplyDelete