I was reminiscing the other day. Reminiscing about life with one baby, and life now with my seventh.
Things change.
They change a lot.
Life with one child is wonderful, and yet a challenge. All these new experiences bring challenges, but great rewards.
Working out how to clothe a small baby, whilst they wiggle, is both time consuming and challenging. I mean, how DO they manage to develop such strength JUST as you try and put their arm through a relatively small hole? The contortions are incredible, as you wrestle to gently, and quickly, pop their arm through the sleeve.
And, what's with the crying every time an item of clothing goes over their head?
PTSD I say. Brings back memories of the process of being born.
My theory, and I stick to it.
Cleaning a baby's nose becomes some kind of torturous event - I currently have to lie him down, pin his arms between one arm and one leg, fix his head still with, well, I don't know what, and try and clean his nose whilst he screams blue murder and wiggles frantically. Am I alone in such a venture?
On the whole, however, being a new parent brings with it an endless list of new skills your baby manages to accomplish. Alongside that is the process of "mothering by the book".
Sterilising.
I'm sorry, what did you say?
Sterilising.
I'm sorry, I don't think I know what you mean. You mean that round object, somewhere in my loft, that I used to put bowls and cups in and put in the microwave? By the time my babies are weaning they are already rolling around on the floor - the come into contact with enough germs to boost the immune system of an army, and sterilising all their bowls and cups is not going to be much help!
Then, there's changing mats and top and tail bowls.
Pardon me?
CHANG-ING MATS.... TOP AND TA...
I heard you. Don't shout... You mean your lap, or the floor, and a bowl you got out the cupboard? I mean, it's so much easier to stick your baby on your knee, and change the nappy there. Top and tail bowls? They take up too much space, and everyone knows you just clean your baby's "top" first and then their "tail" and one bowl does all, right?
Let's not forget about those itty, bitty baby baths.
Baby bath? Oh dear, do you not have a normal bath? I do. I put water in, bath the baby (which takes so little time) and then stick the other children in by turn. Easy peasy. Well, so long as the aforementioned baby doesn't do any "peasy" or "poosy" in the bath before the others can get in....
How about those baby changing bags that you MUST put every single conceivable item you may need for a short trip out with a baby?
Oh, you mean my handbag, with a small bag inside holding a couple of nappies, some wipes and maybe a spare vest and babygro?
But you couldn't possibly manage a trip out with all those special creams, 2 extra change of clothes, a dozen nappies and endless other items?
Yes I could. I may wind up being inventive in case of disaster, but what kind of disasters can one small baby have??
Then, there's that whole excitement about the stages of development.
"Look, he's rolling!!"
Look out, he'll start trying to roll every time you change his nappy, and you will turn into a swift-handed baby-flipper.
"Look, he's sitting up!!"
Look out, now he'll keep bumping his head, and your lovely sofa cushions will become crash mats.
"Look, he's ROLLING!!" "Look, he's crawling!!"
REALLY?? You want your child MOVING? Now endeth the end of sitting peacefully on the sofa, doing any sort of quiet activity, without having to keep jumping up to rescue your small child from impending doom - ranging from being tangled in computer cables, being stuck under chairs backwards, and touching anything they are basically not meant to. HOW many times does one need to jump up and down, on a morning when the baby wakens before you do your devotions, while reading ONE chapter in your Bible?!?
Sit still, play with your toys, and don't move until you're 18, please....
And, let's not even get started on WALKING.
Ohh, look. How cute! He can walk!
Walk = getting around even easier = run = run away = havoc.
You know a first time parent when you see them with a newly walking child, walking around the shops, or out for a walk, or in the supermarket.
Mothers of multiples?
Small children are strapped firmly in a pram until they are bumped out by the next child.
Yep. Parenting has definintely evolved since I had Joshua.
Of course, caveat to finish - no babies were harmed in the making of this blog post, and I LOVE my babies, and every stage of bliss and joy they bring.
*grin*
Things change.
They change a lot.
Life with one child is wonderful, and yet a challenge. All these new experiences bring challenges, but great rewards.
Working out how to clothe a small baby, whilst they wiggle, is both time consuming and challenging. I mean, how DO they manage to develop such strength JUST as you try and put their arm through a relatively small hole? The contortions are incredible, as you wrestle to gently, and quickly, pop their arm through the sleeve.
And, what's with the crying every time an item of clothing goes over their head?
PTSD I say. Brings back memories of the process of being born.
My theory, and I stick to it.
Cleaning a baby's nose becomes some kind of torturous event - I currently have to lie him down, pin his arms between one arm and one leg, fix his head still with, well, I don't know what, and try and clean his nose whilst he screams blue murder and wiggles frantically. Am I alone in such a venture?
On the whole, however, being a new parent brings with it an endless list of new skills your baby manages to accomplish. Alongside that is the process of "mothering by the book".
Sterilising.
I'm sorry, what did you say?
Sterilising.
I'm sorry, I don't think I know what you mean. You mean that round object, somewhere in my loft, that I used to put bowls and cups in and put in the microwave? By the time my babies are weaning they are already rolling around on the floor - the come into contact with enough germs to boost the immune system of an army, and sterilising all their bowls and cups is not going to be much help!
Then, there's changing mats and top and tail bowls.
Pardon me?
CHANG-ING MATS.... TOP AND TA...
I heard you. Don't shout... You mean your lap, or the floor, and a bowl you got out the cupboard? I mean, it's so much easier to stick your baby on your knee, and change the nappy there. Top and tail bowls? They take up too much space, and everyone knows you just clean your baby's "top" first and then their "tail" and one bowl does all, right?
Let's not forget about those itty, bitty baby baths.
Baby bath? Oh dear, do you not have a normal bath? I do. I put water in, bath the baby (which takes so little time) and then stick the other children in by turn. Easy peasy. Well, so long as the aforementioned baby doesn't do any "peasy" or "poosy" in the bath before the others can get in....
How about those baby changing bags that you MUST put every single conceivable item you may need for a short trip out with a baby?
Oh, you mean my handbag, with a small bag inside holding a couple of nappies, some wipes and maybe a spare vest and babygro?
But you couldn't possibly manage a trip out with all those special creams, 2 extra change of clothes, a dozen nappies and endless other items?
Yes I could. I may wind up being inventive in case of disaster, but what kind of disasters can one small baby have??
Then, there's that whole excitement about the stages of development.
"Look, he's rolling!!"
Look out, he'll start trying to roll every time you change his nappy, and you will turn into a swift-handed baby-flipper.
"Look, he's sitting up!!"
Look out, now he'll keep bumping his head, and your lovely sofa cushions will become crash mats.
"Look, he's ROLLING!!" "Look, he's crawling!!"
REALLY?? You want your child MOVING? Now endeth the end of sitting peacefully on the sofa, doing any sort of quiet activity, without having to keep jumping up to rescue your small child from impending doom - ranging from being tangled in computer cables, being stuck under chairs backwards, and touching anything they are basically not meant to. HOW many times does one need to jump up and down, on a morning when the baby wakens before you do your devotions, while reading ONE chapter in your Bible?!?
Sit still, play with your toys, and don't move until you're 18, please....
And, let's not even get started on WALKING.
Ohh, look. How cute! He can walk!
Walk = getting around even easier = run = run away = havoc.
You know a first time parent when you see them with a newly walking child, walking around the shops, or out for a walk, or in the supermarket.
Mothers of multiples?
Small children are strapped firmly in a pram until they are bumped out by the next child.
Yep. Parenting has definintely evolved since I had Joshua.
Of course, caveat to finish - no babies were harmed in the making of this blog post, and I LOVE my babies, and every stage of bliss and joy they bring.
*grin*
yep, definitely. I do use a top and tail bowl, but for wipes, or I did! My baby has now grown into a toddler. I long for another! Never gets boring, does it?
ReplyDeleteYou have me smiling. I'm pregnant with baby 6 and it is new and different each time.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE babies!
ReplyDelete