No pit so deep

I have been having a tough few weeks, hence the blog silence.

I have had one or more person ill in this house, for nearly FOUR weeks.

I have, too, been ill amongst it all.  Last week, and again today.

Swollen tonsils.

Chest infections.

Ear infection.

Cough.

Sinuses.

Colds.

High temperatures.

Generally, yuck.

I. Am. Tired.

It's been the toughest time of sickness in this household, ever.

And yet, despite the fact that I feel so humanly weak.  So humanly weary.  So humanly fraught.

I am sustained by the power, grace and never-failing love of my heavenly Father.

My children are listening to "The Hiding Place" whilst tidying the kitchen for me. (There's a blessing all on its own - the older ones have been SUCH a help.....)  I just heard a wonderful quote, from Betsy Ten Boom.  If she could say this, what are my struggles?

"There is no pit so deep that He is not deeper still" Betsie Ten Boom

She, who was held in a prison in war-torn Europe, in conditions that were vile, filthy and humanly horrendous.  Yet, she still gave thanks to the Lord, amidst such conditions.

My days, over the last few weeks, no matter how hard, are nothing.

"This too shall pass"

No matter how deep we feel we have sunk, in difficulties, trials and hardships, the Lord is still there.  His love goes deeper than the depths of our despair, and He holds us up with His hands.

The verse of the wonderful old hymn "How Firm a Foundation" springs to mind.


"In every condition, in sickness, in health;
In poverty’s vale, or abounding in wealth;
At home and abroad, on the land, on the sea,
As thy days may demand, shall thy strength ever be."


We are given the strength we need, for the circumstances which the Lord allows.  When we are weak, then we are strong.

Based on that premise, I am strong right about now. And, it's true, I am.  I am so incredibly strengthened, and have managed to cope, with few stressy moments, and mostly calmness.  Ok, I have had my odd moment, but all things considered, I feel so very blessed by God's goodness.

I have also very much felt the prayers of so many, who I know have been praying for me.  Had I had this happen even a year or so ago, and without the prayers of my friends, I would not have been coping so well as I am now.

All of the Lord, none of self.

So, I end another day, with a new child falling ill, and I look to the Lord for whatever tomorrow brings.  And a chorus of a hymn, based on a wonderful scripture (my favourite hymn), springs to mind.

"Great is Thy faithfulness,

Great is Thy faithfulness,

Morning by morning new mercies I see,

All I have needed Thy hand hath provided,

Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me."

 "It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. 

They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. 

 The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him."

Lamentations 3:22-24

Looking forward to tomorrow, where His mercies will be new, and His compassions will still be unfailing.

A REALLY important story you should read

I was doing a quick browse of recent FB posts this morning, when I came across THIS story.   It's about a horrible thing that happened to a 5yo.  Basically, whilst her Mum was chatting near their car, her little girl got tangled up in the car seat belts, and could have strangled to death.

Read the story.

Buy some scissors for your car.

I also personally learnt a lesson about giving children lollipops.

When Joshua was about 20 months old, someone gave me some of those hard, boiled sweet type lollipops for him.  I hadn't given them to him before, but I knew my friend gave them to her similar aged child, so I gave him one.  I was sitting RIGHT next to him whilst he ate it, to keep an eye on him.

But, it's amazing how quickly something can go wrong.

He managed to pull the sweet OFF the stick, and he choked.

I noticed STRAIGHT away, but it was stuck in there.  I did what they recommend for a baby who is choking, and tipped him up and hit him between the shoulder blades.

Nothing.

I repeated it, harder, and tipped him up more.

NOTHING.

At this point he was getting no air in or out, and I was starting to panic.

I thought about calling 999, but I quickly realised that by the time they would get there, he would be dead.

I realised I needed to try the Heimlich maeuver, even though it's not what you should do for small children.  I figured better that he had damaged ribs and be ALIVE, than dead and intact.

So, I did the Heimlich, but it took a few attempts.  You know how the story ended, because Josh is indeed alive and well.  But, boy...was that a scary moment.

I now do not give children lollipops until they are a lot older, and have a strict "sit down while you eat that" policy.  I prefer them to have chewy ones than hard ones.  Actually, that's a lie.  I would PREFER that they have none, but that would be slightly over-protective.

I would certainly recommend that every Mum knows what to do if your child chokes.

I was less successful when Abi gave Elijah the last bit of a sweet she had already been sucking, when he was only months old.  We were at Church, and I could NOT get it out.  I was very thankful that 2 of our Church members were nurses, and I just handed him over to one of them, saying "you do it".  Very thankfully, he managed to do it. Poor Abi was just trying to be kind, and had no idea small babies do not eat sweets.

So, read the above article, and hug your children close today, and always be on the look out for their safety.

Beautiful - inside-out!

My children were watching a Bible DVD about David.  It got to the part where Samuel is choosing from Jesse's sons, which should be anointed as king.  Samuel doesn't understand why a prime specimen like Eliab should be passed over, and God tells him this...

"man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart."

I Samuel  16:7

Those words jumped out at me, as I was sitting doing something else in the same room as them.

I was struck by how this verse is truly a verse for women.  We live in a day and age where we are bombarded with advice, information and advertising, for things that will make us more "beautiful".  Weight-loss advice (which, I will say, is not always to do with beauty, but fitness, which IS good), how to style your hair, which make-up is best, which clothes to wear to flatter your figure.  We are given "examples" of beauty in models, actresses, celebrities.  We are constantly pressurised to compare ourselves to such "beauties", and made to feel we just don't cut it unless we measure up to how they look.

I actually know people who think they need to obsessively exercise for the perfect body - that they need to plaster their faces in make-up to hide every single "blemish" - that they need to spend a fortune on having perfect hair - and, that they need wear the latest fashions to look "right".

It makes me sad to see people caught in the world's "snare", of wanting to be beautiful.

Why?

Simply because they are looking to the wrong parameters of what matters.  Look at the verse above.  Eliab

was basically good-looking and tall.  He was, probably, the perfect picture of manhood.  I KNOW it's a man, in this particular story, but I think that in today's world, it's women who are judged in this way MORE than men.  The Lord is not looking for what looks good on the OUTSIDE, He is more concerned about the heart.

THAT, my friends, is what I am talking about.  

We could spend all the time in the world, preening and pruning and primping, to look "just right".   We could spend money we don't really have on make-up, hair products and clothes that we just don't need.  ALL to look good on the outside.  

What is all of that, if our hearts are not right before the Lord?  If we are harbouring sin, that we need to deal with.  If we don't have a loving heart.  If we covet the beauty or possessions of others.

We even have a more specific instruction for us women.

"Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 

But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price."

I Peter 3:3-4

"Meek" and "quiet" seems to conjure up this vision of a  little mouse of a woman, who will not say a word unless spoken to. 

THIS is NOT what it means.

"Meekness" is NOT weakness.  

Meekness is humility and gentleness.  

"Quiet" is NOT being silent at every given opportunity.

Quiet is still, unruffled and immovable.

It is to do with being calm on the inside, whilst everything maybe be going nuts in the world around us!  

OH how like my outside world THAT is!!! As mothers, things can get pretty hairy around us.  Children get into all sorts of mischief, disagreements, scraps, bother and general mayhem! 

So, how do we live this out in our lives?  How can we make sure that this aspect of our "heart", which God sees, is pleasing to Him?

Those moments when we disagree with our husband's about something?  We DON'T descend into a crumpled heap of weeping woman on the floor - fighting to get our own way, and for our opinion to be heard above his.   We remain gentle and calm, and work it out in a way that doesn't involve an emotional outburst.

Those times in the day when our children are being wilfully disobedient?  We DON'T have an outburst of anger and discipline them in the heat of the moment.  We calmly speak to them about their behaviour, and deal with it in a gentle manner.

Those tired moments, when we are struggling to get it all done, we have children being, well, CHILDREN, and the house is descending into anarchy?  We DON'T start yelling at the children (because we haven't dealt with it sooner and it's escalated  by our own neglect, into this chaos), and having a melt-down.  We calmly look at what needs to be done, and gently get things into gear by being the example we should be. 

The examples are endless, and I am sure you will think of some way that you don't normally exhibit "meek and quiet", when you should!

I KNOW it's hard.  I KNOW days can be difficult.  Do you think I came up with my examples out of the fresh air?!? NO!!!  I am an expert at "NOT meek and quiet", to my shame.

I think, like so many other things, that if we have our heart focussed on the Lord through-out the day - if we are immersed in His word - if we live a life of "praying without ceasing" - all of this will help us have our hearts in the right place, where meek and quiet come more naturally.

And, do you see how God describes such a heart?

You can cast aside all the valuable jewellery you may possess, because a heart that is meek and quiet is,  in God's sight, "of great price".  It's a valuable thing to have, and God sees it as precious and worth having.  THIS should be my primary motivation, above all else.  Having a heart that is precious in God's sight. 

So, today, I am going to endeavour to work on my heart's beauty.  

Yes, I will shower, get dressed, and make sure I look presentable on the outside.  

But, my heart will have a work-out and I will do my best, by God's strength, to be that meek and quiet woman that we are told of in I Peter. 

Will you join me? 

Titus 2 - Be sober?

I was reading Titus chapter 2 recently, particularly the passage teaching about how we are to behave as young women.  It struck me that it would be a good place to study through, phrase by phrase, and see what could be learnt from it.

I am tempted to jump to things further along, but if the order we are given is the order that God put it in, who am I to argue with it??

So, what does Titus 2 say?

"That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

Titus 2:4-5

Now, let's get something straight first.  Just because it is directed to young women, does not mean that none of this applies to older women, too!  So, no running off, you older ladies! *winks*

Likewise, just because I am not an aged woman sharing this with you, does not mean you don't have to pay attention, either!

Ultimately, this is GOD'S word to us.  It is Him speaking to me, and to you.

So, the first instruction we are given?  To be sober.

Sober, in this situation,  has NOTHING to do with the lack of alcohol.  It is NOT an indictment to become teetotal.  THAT, my friends, is not a debate I will get into on here.

The word "sober" literally means to be serious.

Now, I don't know about you, but to me that sends out images of a very straight laced and sombre character.  Never a smile.  Never any laughter.

However, I don't think it is meant to be taken to that extreme.  We KNOW that the Bible says that laughter is a good thing, so it can't mean we are to be sombre all the time.  Rather, I think it relates to how we view and live out our lives in a broad sense.  There needs to be a sincerity about what we believe.  A seriousness in how we perceive God's Word, and how we live it out in our lives. A seriousness about things spiritual.

I think it is particularly crucial, when you go on to consider what follows in these two verses.  If you don't take them seriously, then you can basically go and do whatever you jolly well please in your life as a wife and mother.  But, no - the Lord first instructs us to be serious about our lives, and how we live them.

Serious about reading God's Word.

Serious about listening to God's Word.

Serious about understanding God's Word.

Serious about OBEYING God's Word.

Being serious in all these ways is crucial.  It's of primary importance if we are going to be fully committed to a life of obedience, honouring the Lord in all parts of our lives.

So many today, who are often heavily influenced by feminist thoughts, think we can throw verses away.  That we don't need to take them literally.  That they are only figurative.  That we they are cultural.  Perhaps that we only need to keep the spirit but not the letter of what it says?

But, NO!  This is VERY practical.  VERY literal.  VERY important.

What follows in these verses is of utmost importance, and so very, very precious.  God has deigned to give us words that apply to our very heart and soul, and we must endeavour to take them seriously, and fulfil them.

So, before I go any further, I want to search my own heart and make sure that I am taking God's Word seriously.  That I truly desire to honour God's ways above the world's ways, and most certainly above my own sinful heart's ways.

Am I sober? Are we serious about God, and His word to us as women?

I pray that God will make it to be so, and that I will prayerfully consider and obey what follows on from here.

The joys of being a Mum of many

There are times when having a lot of children can become a circus act, of sorts.

Juggling.

That's the name of the act.

Juggling between a poorly 2 year old, a grumpy 6 month old, four doing school work, and a 4 year old who has  drama queen tendencies.

Those days can be tough, and I have had a few of late.

Then you get little moments like yesterday.

Simeon learnt to roll over a little while ago, but yesterday he did it in a bigger way.  He learnt to roll repeatedly, and get somewhere!!  I turned my head for a moment, and he was by the sofa, not in the middle of the floor!

"Did you just move Simeon, Joshua?"

"No, Mum!"

Well, talk about a cheering squad!?   The rest of the children shouted and cheered.  Many shouts of  "clever boy" and "Yay Simeon" erupted around the room.  Toys were found, to put out of his reach to fetch, with more shouting and cheering ensuing, when he dutifully complied and rolled to get them.

It really made me smile.  Seeing them all get as excited as me about their brother doing something new.

A whole troop of cheerers is always a bonus!

Days like that, it makes it all worthwhile.

Baby on the move, on the other hand.....you know you're a mother of more than 1 when you DON'T want them moving.

Then, today...back to juggling.

Poorly baby, choking on phlegm and vomiting, needing lots of cuddles.  And, then the blessing of a 9 year old daughter, making Cottage Pie pretty much on her own, from scratch, to rescue the job of making dinner, leaving me to care for Simeon.

Blessings amidst chaos.  You have to love it!

Simeon on a better day! 

(not today, but Beth being typically helpful. Love that girl)

We will remember them

11/11/11

11th hour.  11th Day.  11th month.

Remembrance day.

We have SO much to be thankful for in our country.  We have so many freedoms, which we take totally for granted.

It's incredibly easy to forget that many, MANY have lost - and are still losing - their lives, to ensure we have those freedoms.

The Great War and WWII were MASSIVE losses for our country, whilst men fought to defend it.

Men and women are still being killed and injured right now, whilst on active duty.

When I was in London with the oldest 3, just last month, I stumbled upon the memorial for the merchant navy. It's just opposite the Tower of London.

My Great Uncle died in WWII, whilst serving in the merchant navy.

I saw the front of the monument first, and it said it was in memory of those who lost their lives in the Great War - WWI.  I thought I wouldn't find my Great Uncle's name, and was disappointed.  Then I stepped behind and realised there was an enormously long wall - convoluted, snaking it's way around the back of a garden - with the names of all those in the merchant navy who had died in WWII.  They were listed according to the ship they had been serving on.

A call to my parents was required, to find out the name of his ship.  Then, a wander around the garden to find the name of his ship.

The Melbourne Star.

And, then I found it.

A.C. Christie.  

Alexander.  Sandy, to his family.

Listed along with the many others who had lost their lives.

It was a very touching moment.  To think that was my flesh and blood, listed there.  My Mum's uncle, who had lost his life serving his country.

Another of her uncles died in WWII.  In a Japanese Prisoner of War camp.

THAT, hardly bears thinking about. 

Such a loss.  Such a debt.

We need to be thankful for their sacrifice.

We need to make use of our freedoms.  Proclaiming God's wonderful grace, whilst we still HAVE that freedom. 

Thank you.  Thank you to all who have, and still do, serve our nation.  

We will remember you.

Build-upper or tear-downer

When Robert was about to finish his studies for the ministry, we were invited to sit on a panel for a Youth Meeting - a "Mr and Mrs" of sorts.  We were asked various questions about ourselves.  I can't remember much about it all, but I remember that we were on the panel with a godly couple who had been in the ministry for many years.  The opposite end of things from us, if you may.

They were asked to give us advice as we entered into this service for the Lord.  I can't tell you what Mr Begg's advice to Robert was, but I can remember what Mrs Beggs said to me.

"Encourage Robert.  Precious few others will do so in his ministry, and you must make sure that you are his encourager.  He will need it. " (that is not a verbatim quote - just the general idea...I have an awful memory for exact quotes...)

That has stuck with me ever since.  Those words, at least.  I have tried very hard, regarding his ministry, that I am an encourager.  I don't pick apart his sermons - I don't highlight his weaknesses - I am not negative - I don't complain about his content or the length of time he preached for.  It's true - plenty others do those things, and he doesn't need me adding to it all.  The devil uses God's people to be a discouragement - often.

Encouraging someone will build them up.  It will help them to be comforted in their labours for the Lord.

Being negative and critical tears them down.  It makes them sad, worried and anxious in their Christian walk and life.

The thing is, as much as I try and do it in his role as a pastor, I seem to forget to put it into practice the rest of the time.  Being a wife who is positive and encouraging should be something I try and do all the time.  I know *I* like to hear words of encouragement, but I don't give them out in the same measure as I expect to receive them!

Likewise, as a mother.  it's SO easy to hand out the negative.

"Don't do that"

"Why are you doing that?"

"I've told you a hundred times not to...."

"When will you learn that you shouldn't..."

It takes a lot more work and effort - a lot more time and thought - to give encouragement.  Sometimes it's outright HARD, because we seem to pick up on the negative so very easily - we see the bad, and don't immediately see the good!  How sinful our hearts are that we have to LOOK for good, instead of seeing it before anything else.

When you think about it, the very essence of consoling and comforting someone -  to encourage them - implies that the other person feels down or discouraged about something.  The point of us encouraging is to lift them up in their spirits.  To do what we can to comfort and console them.  Basically, to give them courage.  To make them feel strong again.

We are all human.  God gave us our humanity.  God KNOWS our humanity.  The Lord Jesus took upon flesh, and lived an earthly life.  He understands our frailty and remembers we are dust.  It is BECAUSE of this, that we are given instruction about giving encouragement to others.  To build the up.  NOT tear them down.

"Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another" 

I Thessalonians 5:11

The word in Thessalonians "edify", literally means "house builder".

Those around us are like houses.  If you build them up properly, they will stay standing through all sorts of onslaught.  All kinds of bad weather, attack from the outside, earthquakes.  The best built houses withstand even the harshest of conditions.

Of course, as with any house, it starts with being built on the good foundations.  So, this principle is especially true of those who love the Lord.  We need to train up our children in the truths of God's work, to prepare their heart for the Spirit's work.

That aside, we still must be encouragers, whether our children, or those around us, have made a profession of faith.  We don't want to tear others down with our words or behaviour - we want to be builders, not demolishers!


How should we BE that encourager  though?

Well, for a start, the words that come out of our mouth have SO much power.  The book of Proverbs has a LOT to say about our tongue, and how we speak to others.

"There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health."

Proverbs 12:18

"A wholesome (or healing) tongue is a tree of life: but perverseness (or visciousness) therein is a breach in the spirit." 

Proverbs 15:4

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue"

Proverbs 18:21

Do you see how it talks of the tongue in relation to HEALTH? How we can heal by the words we use?

You think of a small child, who is hurt or worried.  We talk to them in a way that will soothe and comfort them - to make them feel like everything is ok.

The same applies to life in general.  We will encourage by the words we use, and HOW we say them.  We will give them health in their hearts, by how we speak to them, and by what we say. 

" A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger."

Proverbs 15:1

Oh BOY do I ever find this one hard!  I see other Mums who are so gentle, and here's me struggling to keep calm and use soft words.   If there ever was a verse for me, on bad days,  on most days, it's THIS one. *blush*

The other one I need to be careful with, is sarcasm.  Scots are cursed with the ability to be sarcastic.  I don't think it's appreciated much by my English cohorts, and I must be careful to not use it so much.  We take it as humour in Scotland, but I think it can be offensive down here - people consider it as being condescending, not funny. 

We all know our own hearts and lives, and in what way we need to alter our words and how we say them.

This next verse, in Ephesians, highlights the responsibility we particularly have, regarding the words we use.

"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."

Ephesians 4:29

  This then tells us what we SHOULD say.  We need to speak words that will build others up.  That will help them feel better, and stronger - not worse and weaker.   This verse says that they should minister grace to those that hear them.  This means that the hearer will be grateful for what you have said. 

So, how can we encourage our husbands today?

We can thank them for their love.

We can thank them for their provision of a income.

We can thank them for their help in the home.

We can thank them for taking on responsibilities so that we don't have to.

We can thank them for the things they do for us that make us feel loved and appreciated.

We can thank them for SO many things.  I am sure you can think of things that apply to your own circumstances.


In what ways could we thank them?

With our words.

With actions - leave a note, do something nice for them that they will appreciate, buy them a small gift, make something for them - food usually works - give them some extra "lovin'" (*winks*).

How about our children?

We can praise them for a job well done, even when they think they have not done so well.

We can encourage good behaviour.

We can speak to them gently when rebuking and teaching them.

We can be patient with them, even when we feel frustrated.



There are many others who we can encourage, outside of our home. Extended family, friends, our Church family especially,  and even strangers!  Those who are ill, those who feel low, those who are discouraged by circumstances, those who feel they are not doing a good job of being a wife or mother, those who have needs.  SO many ways and people who we can reach out to today.

Even better, we can teach our children to be encouragers, too!  Help them to find ways to encourage those around them - starting at home first.  Doing little things for others.  Being kind in how they speak to each other.  Helping those in need.

So, do it today!  Find someone to encourage! Don't be weary in well-doing - keep at it, even when it's HARD (says the woman who struggles in SO many ways....).

And, more importantly than anything else...start at HOME.