Matriarchs on a Monday - Rebekah

Next in line after Sarah comes Rebekah.

There are some parts of this story that I LOVE!  I love how the Lord led Abraham's servant to Rebekah, to be Isaac's wife.  I LOVE that Abraham and Sarah  knew that it was important for their son not to marry a heathen, and cared enough for their son to find him the right wife.  I LOVE that God answered the prayer of Isaac and gave his barren wife TWINS!

There are some things I don't like so much.  I don't like that Isaac and Rebekah got into the same fix as their parents, and lied about being a married couple.  Personally, I try and learn from my parents, and try not to make the same mistakes as them.  However, I don't always learn as well as I should, and I know I fail the Lord.

I also, especially, don't like something else, and I think it is an important lesson for us all.

"And Isaac loved Esau, because he did eat of his venison: but Rebekah loved Jacob."

Genesis 25:28  

Oh,but is this an important lesson to learn.   We MUST  not show favour to one child over another!  We cannot be unequal in our love or treatment of our children! 

I KNOW that our children are all different.  I have 6 children, and I know how different they all are.  Some are more gentle, some are more boisterous, some are more serious, some are more mischievous.  Some obey more readily, some do not.  Some are more inclined to kindness, others need more prompting to be kind.  I guess, there are times when certain children, in human terms, are more lovable, whilst others are more trying.  It could be very easy to show favour to the ones who are "easier".  Sometimes it could be that we are tempted to show favour to the ones who are actually HARDER work, by giving them more time and attention, whilst neglecting the "easier" ones.  

I sincerely try not show my children favour.  I would hope that if I asked them, that they would acknowledge that I love them all the same, and don't show special treatment to one over another.   They all need my love and attention equally, because it would be so easy to provoke your child to wrath, by being obviously preferential.

Look where it got Rebekah....

She overheard Isaac's request to Esau, to go and prepare the meal for him, so he could give his blessing to him.  Rebekah was determined that her favourite son should receive that special blessing, belonging to the first-born, Esau.  So, she conspired against her HUSBAND, to sneakily enable Jacob to gain the blessing, by deceit. 

Oh, Rebekah, Rebekah!  If there is something that we shouldn't do, as wives, it is to deliberately conspire to manipulate our husband's, or to go against their wishes!  Our husband's have been given a place of authority, by GOD.  If we are not happy with their decisions, we respectfully speak to them about it, but we don't do our own thing, BEHIND THEIR BACKS!  NO, NO!  

And, what is worse, is that she encouraged her SON to disrespect his father's authority, too!  That is also SO wrong! We mustn't "bad talk" our husbands - speak disrespectfully about them - undermine their authority by trying to overturn their decisions, or try and get our children to manipulate their decisions.  If Daddy says "no", we back it up.  If Daddy tells them off, we don't let them come running to us for 2oh, poor little child" treatment.  We need to stand firm with their decisions.  And, again, if you disagree, do it privately, when the children are not there.  (Can I just say, I have work to do in this area....)  We are setting our children an example in how we behave.  To our daughters, how to behave as a wife; to our sons, what to expect of a wife.  We must be supportive and submissive.  Always.  

This underhanded move by Rebekah, ended up causing a family rift that lasted for many years.  Esau was so mad with Jacob, that he wanted to KILL his own brother! Such an unwise choice, Rebekah.  Not the way a wife and mother ought to behave.

Once again, however, we can look to the grace of God, and see His mighty hand at work in it all.  God greatly blessed Jacob, in many, many ways.  And, of course, he was in the line that begat the Saviour! 

However, just because God works all things together for good, does NOT give us the licence to do what we like!  We need to honour His Word and His ways, and seek to obey in every part of our lives.  We need to seek to be the wives and mother's that we ought to be, by His wisdom and grace alone.  

Oh, and just as a little PS....a couple of  other things.  Both sad, as a warning, I guess?  Firstly, Esau married an ungodly woman, from a heathen nation.  This was a sadness to Isaac and Rebekah.

"And Esau was forty years old when he took to wife Judith the daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and Bashemath the daughter of Elon the Hittite: 
 Which were a grief of mind unto Isaac and to Rebekah." 

Gen 26:34-35 

Yes, as I have said, we need to raise our children to become a godly generation.  We cannot save them, but we can give them advice.  If our children are saved, and belong to the Lord, we need to teach them not to be unequally yoked in marriage.  They must seek a wife who loves the Lord, or they will be disobeying God.  I can understand that this would be a grief of mind to them! :-(  However, the fact the Esau himself did not follow God's ways, I am sure would have been of even greater grief.  May we plead with the Lord every day, for the salvation of our children, and that the Lord will lead them to godly spouses!  Right from the day they are born! 

And, another note of sadness.  We know that Isaac had to flee, after his deception over the blessing, due to threat of death from his brother.  Well, the mother who favoured her son so much?...we never hear of her seeing her son, who she favoured so highly, ever again! How sad!  She forced him into the position of having to run for his life, and ended up paying for her deception.  What a serious consequence, to end up being separated from your child, because of a sinful choice.  

Oh, dear ladies, may we be guided by God alone, in the choices we make as wives, mothers or even if you are single! So much hangs upon the way we live and behave, that can have a long-term impact o those around us!  May we learn from Rebekah, and be more like Christ this week, and always!